Is it a big deal?

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I saw a news ad flyer in my mailbox today that read…

“Big Deals of the Week!”

And I instantly thought of all the people (and I used to be one of them) who have a “big deal” or big drama going on all the time, and generally a new one every week.

It’s an exhausting way to live, always waiting for that bomb to explode and never knowing which one might be a dud and which one a live explosive that will tear your world apart.

This “big deal” habit is one that can be very hard to break, because all too often the person who has the habit is unaware they are actually the one in control. It’s a thought process. And it’s fear-based.

One of the reasons it can be so difficult to extricate yourself from this thinking habit is that by now it feels very normal to you. You spend so much time in your head, worrying about what might happen next in life, and trying to solve problems that haven’t even arisen yet, that you don’t see how useless all this “busy thinking” actually is. It’s imaginary! The situations are not even real most of the time. Generally, it is over-reaction to what others are doing, out of fear that things will be even worse tomorrow and so you’d better try to control the mess today and keep a tight lid on it.

If you have the “big deal” habit, you might be able to recognize it by noticing this pattern:

  • Do you constantly have a drama to tell your best friend or spouse about each day?
  • Do you fret endlessly about all the possibilities inherent in each situation, as if you must figure out all the answers, no matter what other people choose?
  • Do you have a hard time sleeping well, because your thoughts just won’t quit with all that drama playing in your mind?

Recognizing the behavior is the crucial beginning toward change, so take time to notice how often you create big dramas in your life out of the little molehills.

The “big deal of the week” habit produces a tremendous amount of stress. There are a lot of solutions waiting for you in my stress management book, “Forget Your Troubles: Enjoy Your Life Today” if you’d like to grab a copy of the ebook now. Instant access, 24 hours a day. And it’s cheap.

More tips tomorrow about how to lead a happy and low-stress life.

your happiness guru,

Evelyn Brooks

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